Rationality

                     When your behaviours are governed by emotions and not rational thoughts, you see things through a narrow lens. The problem with it is that we think we are seeing things through a rational mind, and just like everyone else, we aren't. The good thing is that rationality is more like a skill than a talent. Someone can acquire rational thinking through continuous practice. 

                    

                    Let us first dive into our emotions, which the actual reason for irrational thinking. Emotions are always infecting your world view and the more we let them control our decisions, the less control the rational mind has. For example, all of us have experienced a feeling of disconnection with ourselves when we are angry. We say things that we don't really mean. We hurt our loved ones with words we wouldn't even use for our enemies. We make decisions that we normally would think of to be senseless. And once the feeling settles down, our guilt hits us like a tsunami wave, but by then the damage is already done. 

                    When we are angry, we can take a moment to ask ourselves what exactly is the actual reason behind our anger. Many of the times the answer will have nothing to do with the other person. For this, imagine yourself having an out of the body experience, and standing next to you yourself. One to be the rational mind, and the other to be the one to take senseless decisions. Look deep and stop blaming the external world for the emotions that bubble up in you. Be honest with yourself. Of course, we won't be able to do this on the very first try. But practising this frequently can help us look into ourselves and help us achieve self-realization.

                    If we let our emotional mind blame the external factors like the government, the neighbours,  luck, etc., we let these explanations intensify the feeling of helplessness, depression, anxiety, anger, frustrations, etc., that can make us feel like a victim and feel bad for ourselves. This furthers the control that emotions have on us, pushing us into a loop where irrationality completely takes over. Taking the example of anger itself, when we show anger to someone even though we are actually feeling something else, the other person will feel personally attacked. And since the other person cannot see the actual underlying reason, it leads to a cascading set of misinterpretations.

                    Do understand though that no one can escape the effects emotions can have on our lives, not even the wisest. It is in our human nature to feel emotions. We do not have conscious access to emotions and thus we can't just cut them off. And emotions are not a bad thing to have. There is a reason for every emotion we feel. For example, our ancestors felt fear when they see a snake in the grass. Evolution has helped them realize that a snake can cause harm. The fear pumps adrenaline into their body which puts them in a fight or flight mode, helping them get to safety. In today's world, we dwell on emotions, intensifying them and letting them affect us even after moments of danger. 

                    The issue with irrationality is that we may call someone irrational just because they don't agree with us. Our emotions always steer us towards thoughts that keep us in our comfort zone. These kinds of thoughts will soothe our egos. Rational people are aware of this and thus will be able to subtract emotions while judging, whereas irrational people have no such awareness. There are steps you can take to reduce your irrationality.

                    Step 1. Understanding biases: We must learn about the biases that we form that emerge from our emotions. These biases cloud your judgement to prevent you from making logical decisions. 

1. Confirmation Bias: 

            This makes us think that we have arrived at the judgement based on facts and evidence. Usually, we would have already created an idea based on preconceived notions. Then when we go out in search of evidence, we end up finding those evidence that soothes our ego, ignoring those evidence that does not confirm our preconceived notion. And this has been funnelled by the infinite amount of resources available on the internet that may support both sides of the argument. We end up seeing the things we want to see.

2. Conviction Bias:

            This makes us think that if we believe in something strongly then it must be true. It makes us blindly contradict anyone who tries to challenge the views we have. They believe that if they express an opinion with heated words and gestures, vibrant anecdotes and metaphors with a strong sense of conviction, then they must have obviously examined the facts and figures carefully before presenting. And also we feel that those ideas expressed with a hesitant tone reveal self-doubt and weakness. They know people are hungry for entertainment, and so dress up their half-truths in dramatic effects. 

3. Appearance Bias:

            This makes us think we know the people that we are dealing with and accept their personality to be as they are showing themselves to be.  We usually see people as they appear to us and not as they actually are. And appearances are usually misleading. A popular effect related to this is the halo effect. This causes us to think that good looking people must be good at heart as well. 

4. Group Bias:

            This makes us think that we are not affected by a group's ideas and that whatever thoughts we have, are of our own creation. Take the example of political views. If one follows the left or right, their orthodoxy prevails, and it is due to the effect of the group's ideologies on them. Groups continuously affect our emotions and behaviours. Just compare your behaviour in a concert to that in other public places.

5. Blame Bias:

            This makes us think that we are learning from our mistakes but in truth, we do not like looking at our mistakes. Our next response is to find reasons to blame others. This is because introspection hurts the ego. We may pretend to learn from our mistakes, but eventually, our desire and emotions drive us to blame everyone except ourselves. Ultimately this will lead to repetition of the same mistakes over and over.

6. Superiority Bias:

            Makes us think we are more rational, more ethical and different from others. A few may even mention they are so in a conversation and it makes them look arrogant. The mentioned qualities are highly promoted in the culture and to give us a sense of belonging, we believe that we are good, rational and unique even though we may not be. These qualities do not come naturally. We must put in efforts and increase our awareness. We will believe that those against us have opinions based on irrational thoughts because it scares us to even think that we may be irrational.

 

                    Step 2. Recognizing inflaming factors: Once we have understood the various biases we may have, it is necessary to realize various factors in and around us that push us towards irrationality. Starting from childhood traumas that manifest in adulthood. For example, being adamant, fussing over small stuff etc. 

            Another bad habit we for is that of instant gratification. Happiness that lasts long will only come through hard work. For example, hundreds of likes on social media may give temporary happiness, but it is not true happiness and it doesn't last. 

            Many people may seem calm and composed, and you may think it must be very simple for them. What we need to realize is that they are just like us. Everyone's true nature only comes out only when put under pressure. 

            Charismatic people are dangerous. Especially when they have wrong intentions. They have a way of scooping you up in whatever mess they are creating and you won't realize it until it's too late. Practising a form of detachment will help you to form opinions that are not under the influence of any such powerful people.

                    Step 3. Rationalize: Finally, we need to bring out the rational self, keeping in mind the various obstacles there are for it.  

            Self-realization: Catch yourself acting on emotions. Pause for a moment. Reflect on how you behave under stress. Find out your weaknesses that have come out in such moments. Question yourself concerning the various biases and external factors that may have played in that particular situation. 

            Assess emotions: Ask yourself when you act emotionally and what exactly might be its root cause. For example, most of the time when we are angry with someone, the actual reason might be completely unrelated to the person we are angry with. Ask yourself and contemplate on it. Find a neutral position to look from.

            Increase your reaction time: Don't jump to conclusions. Don't start speaking before you have really thought about it well. Take a step back when you get new information. Cross verify it from all angles before reaching a conclusion. It will take time, but slowly you will improve.

            Accept people as they are: Recognize people's patterns. Stop judging them for everything. Don't try to change people who don't want to change. Work with what they offer you. Stop trying to control things, and look at everyone like a phenomenon. There will definitely people who are really difficult to handle. Empathize them. You will actually start feeling pity than hatred.

            Balance: Learn to balance emotion with thought. Compare emotions to be horses, and rider to be thoughts. Neither can do without each other. Thoughts need to be trained to handle the emotions and to keep them in check. Neither must take full control. Channel energy and not enslave it.

            Love rationality: Look at achieving rationality as something that you love rather than looking at it as something you need to put a lot of effort into. Understand the importance of rational thinking and inculcate it without letting it be painful.